Beautiful

What should I write about, today? It's not always easy to know. A few years ago, there was a time in my life where I was not doing anything. I had graduated the spring before, taken a four-month internship that fall, gone to GYC in Baltimore, to the Bahamas with my friend, and then come home. Home, to do nothing. It was the second semester of a school year, so I had missed going to college that year, and I had nothing to do. I think I might have worked during that time, but I remember the prevailing feeling was hopelessness and depression. It was a dark time in my life. There were a few factors involved in that depression, but one of the main problems was jealousy. While I was at home, doing nothing, I could read people's blogs, see their pictures on Facebook, and find out all about the exciting times they were having. My friends looked infinitely happier, more fulfilled, and focused than I was, and I was jealous. Really jealous. I wasn't jealous of all the selfies o...

Dear Mom and Dad, I haven't been putting pictures up because we have to share the internet, and it takes so long to upload them. Today we went to town for the third time since we've been at Sunshine Orchards. A couple of days ago we went twice, because the town is only 5 k from here. The first time we drove in with Hannah Steck and the second time we started walking there with Sabrina Peterson and ended up catching a songthaew (Pronounced song tau. It's a local taxi truck.) the rest of the way. A girl from New Zealand happened to also be riding the songthaew and we were happy to converse with another English speaker. Actually, her English was pretty intriguing. Instead of New Zealand, she said something like "Niw Zilend". Esther Collier would understand her pretty well. Anyway, today we went to a town about thirty minutes away, to take some native Karen to the hospital. The one little lady had kidney stones, but you couldn't really tell she was in pain exc...

Dear Mom and Dad, Greetings from the future! Disclaimer: I must confess, I'm jet-lagged. The staying up all night didn't really help. Or maybe I'm tired because our days start around 4:00-4:30 am, in order to be ready for worship at 5:30 am. Surprisingly, I only missed one worship, because I didn't really sleep the night before. If you could see where I'm sleeping... Actually, I'll just tell you. So after we spent the night in Bangkok, we woke up the next morning. and walked around the market with Mr. Atwell. Before I got there, I was thinking about walking around Bangkok barefooted (just to be a hippie) but I changed my mind when I got there. The streets were pretty...unsanitary. Lots and lots of concrete, electrical wires, construction zones, people, trucks, motorbikes, idols, animals, flowers, junk...I would not want to live in Bangkok. It seems like every building is a housing unit, and literally every available space is a construction site for a n...

It’s been five days now, since I first entered Thailand. I haven’t yet written much about the trip or the five days here yet, either because of culture shock or jet lag or my typically delayed response to life. I’ve had plenty of time to write, but there’s just so much… So much to write, but it’s all about the most commonplace things that it almost seems silly to waste time describing them. Anyway, I guess I’ll pretend like I’m living a long time ago, when kids who left home would write detailed letters to their parents about their new living situation. ahem. Dear Mom and Dad (and you, Reader),             I guess it’s been an awful long time since I last wrote you all. I won’t make any excuses about not having any time to write, so I’ll just apologize for not doing it sooner. How is everything back home? I sure miss everyone there. Give them all my love. Thailand is a much different place...

My blog has been fairly euphemistic and happy up until now. Not that I don't feel that way anymore, but my life just gained a new sense of reality and my writing is going to reflect that, whatever emotion comes up. My writing may get better, or it may get worse, but it's going to be real. Really me. I’m swinging in a hammock in my bamboo/wooden hut at the near-top of the hill, looking down through the open window on the campus of Sunshine Orchards. I’m trying to have my devotions, but I am finding it a little bit hard to concentrate because this is such an incredibly different place. I slept on the floor; the hard floor. Under a mosquito net. With many strange, loud, jungle noises sounding all night long. Wondering if my hut has a giant lizard hanging out in the rafters like the chapel did. Will anything fall on me while I'm asleep? Will I wake up with dengue fever? Am I going to make it? Just before the day breaks, while the night lingers, a chorus o...

Here we are at the Los Angeles International Airport. Fifteen minutes until we need to go join the mass of human beings downstairs at the ticket counter. Are they all flying on the same plane with us?? They are probably looking at each other and thinking the same thing. I have only slept about 5 1/2 hours the last two nights, so perhaps I'm a little scattered and fuzzy, but if I can make myself learn to think when I'm tired, than I'll be able to think better when I'm not, right? When I have nothing else to do, I can enjoy the mentally stretching process of observing and analyzing myself and everything else around me. Airport layovers are absolutely perfect for this.  Now I will ascend one of my favorite soap boxes... Here in just one terminal of the airport, there are multiple huge posters of the same seductive Esteé Lauder model with the caption "Re-Ignite the Youthful Light of Your Eyes". Of course, you must buy the advertised product, whi...